More about Mom

So I keep having these strange feelings like if I could just open my eyes (yes, they're already open), Mom would be standing there. I know it's all part of the grieving process, but damn it's a long process. I think it's harder that her death was so sudden. I can still hear Glenda saying, "I think she's gone." over and over in my mind. I really wish that it all was a bad dream that I could just wake up from. The problem is that I wake up every morning and it's not a dream. As hard as it is for me I can not even imagine what it's like for Anthony. They were sooooo close. She was his only parent. And then I get angry for Lillie. It's just not fair having to grow up without your grandmother. It's definitely not what I wanted for her. I guess in a way it is good that she's too young to remember much. She won't really know what she's missing, but I will.